Something odd happened to me a year ago on this date. It would actually be tomorrow that I experienced it but I’m certain that it was two full days of benediction that brought it out.

Pulled it out?

Slapped me in the head?

How do you describe a spiritual awakening that you’d never heard of before? You hear about spiritual awakenings and you think about the hand of God reaching down to touch you, nudge you, speak to you. Jesus and all his friends clapping as you wake up.

I can’t tell you what that’s like. What I felt is all relative to these names and theology but at the same time it’s off a little.

Backstory – I went to Hunting Island State Park to relax for a couple of days last year. First night I had dinner and partook in about 4-5 grams of psilocybin. I indulge in mushrooms about twice a year. I’m not a pro or expert I take them from time to time to let go for a bit. Mushrooms are amazing. They connect the dots in your brain for you. I could write a small book on the benefits of psilocybin but it’s not the subject of the story this morning and I’m moving out of my home in three hours.

For brevity let’s say mushrooms help things make sense in the world with ease.

The night was fun, low key. I walked around the campground at night with a blanket for a shawl with my headphones on and stared at the stars for a bit. And pine cones.

Next day was a regular ole day. I hung out on the island and watched the palms dance in the wind. Had breakfast, lunch and dinner and proceeded to hang out in my tent once it got too dark to do anything else. I was in my environment, headphones, feet propped out of the tent. It was a cool 55° ish and I was smiling and profiling. Around 9pm a song came on my headphones I’d heard a few dozen times before but this time it hit a little different. Different is too mild of a word. The song, instead of playing into my ears, decided to enter my entire body. It resonated inside of me and shook me out of my current state of mind. I hit a euphoric state so intense that I felt like something much bigger than me touched me.

Shook me.

The euphoria was so intense that the only thing I could think of was I was dying and this is how you phase into the universe.

Or I had already died.

I sat in my tent with tears rolling down my face and chills all over my body. My initial thought was literally “what the fuck just happened?” I threw myself halfway outside of my tent to catch my breath. I thought I was dying. My face was flush my tent was hot even though it was February. I thought I was going to hyperventilate. After about 2 minutes that felt like 2 hours I came back down and crawled back inside of my tent. I smirked a little with a WTH? and lied down. It took a while for me to relax, in my head I was still downloading the experience. I do recall thinking at that moment “hey please don’t make me a messenger of spirituality, I’m the wrong guy for that shit”

That should’ve been the first sign that my life would never be the same. I knew something shook me awake.

The next day was just another day. I had to go back to work and spent my morning folding everything up and packing. I do recall calling my wife and while talking I had mentioned “something odd” happening last night. I didn’t tell her I thought I was going to die last night and I don’t recommend ever saying something like that to your significant other.

I felt weird. I recall a ringing in my ears for a while that day. I went back to work, a little sluggish from the drive. Went home and life resumed back to the life of Chad.

For a bit

Weird that the song that rang in my ears that night is currently on my headphones.

This is where it gets hard to explain things and directions.

My mind shifted over a brief period.

I started to have interests in subjects I didn’t even think about before that night.

Carl Jung psychology

Rumi poetry

Chakras

Gnosticism

Multiple realities

Nag Hammadi

Hermetic philosophy

Ancient symbols, coding

I could go on and on. Other teachers I’d never discovered or focused on and much more.

366 days ago I couldn’t tell you a single thing about any of these people or subjects. The subject matter alone would’ve gotten a raised skeptic eyebrow from me if you brought it up in conversation.

That’s when I started seeing my trail markers. Highlighted thoughts and signs in my head.

Intuition spikes

Vibrational changes

Algorithms

Patterns

Gut feelings

My mind went into a reset mode. Not overnight. It was subtle and thank god because it’s been a hell of a ride to this day.

Something cracked open my mind. Wide fucking open.

I’ve been trying to figure it out ever since. Not occasionally mind you. I wake up with it in my head and it doesn’t fade until I go to bed.

It’s not an obsession it’s my life now.

I’m going to breeze through this part and walk lightly. I’m not here to try to convert or change your opinion on life or religion. Not my place. In fact unless you have experienced what I have you won’t get it. That’s not some elitist cult bullshit I just don’t have the words to describe the feeling and emotions.

People get weird when you don’t align with them spiritually. Sometimes angry and I’m not here for that. I’m not here to change your mind. It’s not my job or prerogative.

Once it’s there it’s there to stay

There’s no “eh I’m over it”

Once you see/feel it doesn’t go away.

You dont need validation because once you experience it your intuition holds it for you. It changes how you see things. You aren’t turning back the gate has opened on one end and closed on the other.

It changes you

How you approach things

How you feel about things and others.

The first few weeks I was thinking I was experiencing some sort of psychosis. I was all over the place. I hadn’t learned yet how to filter out all the noise in my head. It’s not like an app download in your mind it’s a complete reset with a new software update. And you don’t get any tips or instructions.

A giant veil gets ripped from your eyes.

Your reality changes. Literally everything does.

I thought I was crazy for a bit but after doing a little legwork I find more and more people that have experienced the same thing as me.

Same

Exact

Intuitions

Perspectives

Stories

Feelings

Coincidences. Actually there’s no such thing as a coincidence.

It’s like you joined a club of a few thousand.

But

It’s growing. People are waking up. I’ve witnessed a few fb friends wake up and I’m like “hey! Welcome to the new world!”

I’ll say this and this is all you’ll get from me unless we are talking in person.

We’ve been lied to for sometime.

A loooooong time

About what Chad?

Literally everything.

Every

Thing

The world is a stage of distractions and chess players.

This is why I dissociate from current events. This is why I don’t engage with politics and news outlets.

Sorry y’all I’m no longer here for it.

I disconnected. Actually that’s not correct. I connected to my real self. A much higher self. No that doesn’t mean accession or any higher level of authority or life. I’m just starting to think on my own for once with no outside influences.

Connected by Stereo MCs is on my headphones right now. Quite the coincidence. Oh wait there’s no such thing.

“If you make sure you’re connected

The writing’s on the wall

But if your minds neglected

Stumble you might fall”

There are so many coded songs with messages out there if you listen closely.

Prince threw it in your face several times.

Music

Hertz

Vibrations

It’s all connected.

You won’t find it it’ll find you.

Hold on tight when it does.

Sometimes I wonder if I actually did die that night. I walked out of that tent a different person

Oh well. Time to finish packing

Peace ☮️