My goal is to type 1000 plus words when I write. I don’t count them but my previews let me know how many words, characters and blocks I use. 1000 just seems like a solid number to get my point across. I usually write from my phone but on occasion I’ll use my laptop specifically bought to write with. It’s just a habit of mine to use my phone since I seem to have it in my hands 75% of my day.

I’m currently wrestling with my addiction to this little texter and scroller.

I’ve been writing for almost 2 years now although I’ve ramped it up a bit over the last 8–10 months. My noise canceling headphones have done some amazing work with my focus. No, I’ve never been diagnosed with ADHD in all honesty I’ve probably been to the doctor three times in the last 30 years so I haven’t been diagnosed with anything but spend a day with me and tell me what you think. Writing pins me down in a good way. When I write I put on some soft frequencies and let my thumbs go crazy. I rarely have a subject line I’ll sometimes begin to write and then I’ll go back and rearrange my thoughts.

I just write what comes out.

Often times my daughter will have to poke me to let me know it’s time to take her to school. I might write for up to three hours if I’m in my own little meditative world. Being half blind comes in handy. I can see a gnat’s lips close up but I can’t see my feet without my glasses. Unfortunately I can’t see close up when I wear my glasses so when I write I’m hyper focused because I can barely see or hear a damn thing other than what’s directly in front of me. Quite the optometry paradox.

Focus 2.0

Writing is a part of my meditation. It lowers the survival mode in my brain. The more I write the more things I let go. I truly believe writing down what’s on your mind is the best therapy. When it’s out there for you to read it’s easier to reckon with.

When I’m done writing I go for a walk. I wear the same headphones although I don’t keep them on noise cancellation because I need to have some awareness when I’m walking so I don’t become a speed bump. When you’ve hiked as many miles as I have you get a thing about looking over your shoulder to make sure there’s nothing big and furry walking behind you. Sometimes trees fall out of nowhere too. Once you’ve had one or two drop near you it will keep you on your toes.

When I walk I’ll go into a light meditative status for about half an hour usually after my first mile but never my last. Walking is a great way to clear your mind while also burning 100 calories per mile. I walk at a 15:00 to 16:00 minute pace. I try to put in at least 3-4 miles when I walk. It’s probably my favorite routine. I used to run the same mileage but my body told me it was time to stop. Maybe for good. When your body talks you listen.

I have two days off a week and if I’m home both days I’ll set aside 20 minutes to rest. That may be a quick nap or just covering my eyes and lying on my back. Bedtime routine for me is usually in bed by 8:30 and asleep by 9:15. My routine includes headphones and a specific playlist of music I listen to every single night. I allow this time to clear my head before bed. I’m done with waking up with bad things on my mind. I reckon with them at night in a casual way. I go out of my way to make peace with my day. If it’s a bad one I focus on making tomorrow a better one. If it’s a good one and I get more of these now than I used to I give myself a mental thumbs up.

I make it a point in my conscious mind that the last thing I think about before I go lights out is something positive. It may be an old camping trip I did three years ago or something a customer said about my business while eating in my shop. I give my brain a nice pat on the back, I physically smile and then I turn to sleep.

I shared these routines with you to give you some insight as to how often I meditate. I’ve spent the last 4 years of my life for the pursuit of level headedness and repairing my mental health.

Self evaluations

Meditation

Cleanse

Cleansing my body and mind of chemical toxins and mental ones.

Four years of reckoning from 30 years of self abuse.

Four years of speaking to and trying to read my self- consciousness aloud. The last year alone at least 1 hour a day of meditation and reckoning.

Quite the devotion if you ask me. Like any other practice if you do it enough it becomes part of you. The only thing that I’ve accomplished more in the past year would be charcuterie boxes. Both I have absorbed over the last few years. I can pretty much charcuterie just about anything now.

Go me

Charcuterie isn’t a big deal to me it never has. I’m making homemade, edible jigsaw puzzles in a box.

But

Take the first few I did when I started them and compare them now to what I can make now. There’s no comparison. Practice, practice, honing and research. I applied to this practice every single day. You do the same thing on a daily basis you get better at it. Especially if you focus on your improvement. I can say I’ve done this with meditation and writing.

I’ve logged some hours man. I do this to be the best composition for the people who love and support me.

I use a little self hypnosis at night to prepare myself for the following day. When I focus on the smiling things at night it sets me up for my algorithms the next day.

My mind lately has been on building my own physical and mental algorithms.

Algorithms in layman terms are “essentially a series of well-defined instructions that, when followed in a specific order, lead to a desired outcome”

You have them on your social media scrolling routines, your feeds, reels, advertisements. Facebook doesn’t create them you do for the most part. If you post “I love vacuums! as your status update on fb I’m willing to bet you’ll get some random advertisements for Roombas, carpet cleaners, Hoovers in the next hour or two. I like the Atlanta Braves, lifelong fan. I don’t engage in sport pages they annoy me but I’ll click on espn to see the scores and highlights of their games and my fb page wil start to slowly blend in all the Braves pages. If I engage they’ll stick around if I scroll past they’ll eventually fade and another interest of mine will take place.

If I opened up my search bar on IG right now all of my squares and rectangles will be filled with glimpses of camping vehicles, music videos and pics of Utah and Colorado because I’m going there next month and I’ve entered it as a keyword in my search bar. I built those. I’ll also get memes and some women bouncing around in bikinis that don’t quite fit because IG has my personal info. They have my date of birth and gender so they have a tendency to assume I’ll like these other things. They aren’t wrong mind you I just don’t search for these types things out just like I can’t help slowing my truck down when I come across a car wreck. I don’t wish to engage in these or I’ll be up to my neck in it. It’s not as fun as it may sound..

Facebook is easy to assign your algorithms. It takes all your posts and keywords, your comments on other pages, friends posts and engagements and any affiliations you may have with politics. They love when you engage in conflict. It sells Facebook tickets. Algorithms aren’t always things you like to see in all honesty I believe most of them are created to pull you in and not the opposite. If you complain about a drive-thru fast food experience you’re likely to find 20 McDonalds ads pop up in your feed. If you say you hate Musk you’ll get flooded with EV advertising and forums with discussions about burning Teslas and then you may get something about the old big hair band Tesla coming to a venue near you.

If you talk about an actor I imagine you’ll see a reel of an old movie scene with them appearing in it. I brought up a topic about my old Nissan 200sx and I’ll be damned if I didn’t see a pic of a similar one on fb.

There are billions of options of videos, pages, posts, reels, topics and opinions online that you are choosing consciously and subconsciously to fill your up social media scrolling gaps. Your social media scrolling is your’s and your’n alone. It’s scripted. You wrote it whether you meant to or not. Even your news feeds. You’re gong to read and hear exactly what you want to and then some on the opposing side .

Insert tunnel vision

You’re creating your own online reality with what you’re comfortable and what you like to engage in. Does this sound familiar with the subject of my last few posts? I hope so because it’s relative.

This can be unhealthy to some of us who get caught up in “these trying times” or “the new normal” I don’t engage in most of these anymore. I used too quite a bit. Current times have a way of shooting arrows of distraction and chaos in our already weary and over stimulated heads. It takes over our peace of minds. We allow it to with open arms and tablets.

Even work things, my professional page is filled with charcuterie and food pics. That’s tame compared to my personal one but I can only take so many charcuterie videos they are all literally the same. Charcuterie art has peaked we’re just moving things around differently on the platter. Also algorithms can be linked by annual or seasonal pop ups. I get the same charcuterie memes seasonally. Every Halloween I’ll get tagged in the same 4 Halloween charcuterie pics. I love you guys but I spend enough time doing chadcuterie in real life. I prefer to turn it off when I’m home. If I had the same amount of you actually buy my boxes as you tag me in posts I could retire.

Sorry that was a cheap shot. I’m working on that too.

I’m sure by now most of us are aware that our phones do listen to what we say and what we do. We blame it on Apple, androids, medias, politicians, demons and angels but we are the hosts. We are curating it. If you don’t want McDonald’s advertisements blowing up your feed then don’t eat there. Don’t post about it or anything about fast food places. I wouldn’t bring up Grimace or clowns holding hamburgers because algorithms are smarter than you think. We can also pick up them up just by driving by or near one.

Is there a musical artist you don’t like? Don’t talk about them online. Don’t engage on a post that they are mentioned because you’ll land on that algorithm. If you say “I can’t stand ________!” Welp you just invited them into your feed. You did this. Not Zuck he just supplies the grid.

You’re moving the chess pieces all on your own.

I left that part about the artist blank. Had I thrown a name in there it would be in my feed soon. Algorithms move place to place on frequencies. Just like we do. I get quite a few pop ups related to my blogs because the internet all comes together one way or another.

Here’s some positives about algorithms, you can control them. You have absolute control over your algorithms. If you’re like certain reels, forums and TikTok videos you can react and engage with them to keep them around. You can also block them if you don’t. Or just scroll on. Dont like seeing a certain page? Hide it. Do you keep seeing that same page or similar ones? Most likely you engaged on a similar one or you it’s closely linked to another interest of yours. You may love football but hate the Gamecocks because you’re a Clemson fan but you’ll never clear your feed of USC dander because they are linked. Polarization is a part of your algorithms. Man that’s a whole ‘nother topic I may try to consider but I may not here. Politics are the same thing. If you’re far left you’re going to get bombarded with far right extremism. If you engage. If you don’t like Musk you’ll still get him in your face and feed because you’ve most likely engaged in subject matter that he was involved in. Not only is he now living in your head he’s living on your feed. We do love to post about things we dislike in here.

If you’re pro something and feel strongly about it you’ll be handed the other side in your lap to deal with too. If you engage, you see an opinion you find completely ridiculous or wrong (in your opinion) and remark. You just invited that other person’s opinion and pov into your algorithm. Don’t get upset. You did it not the evil Zuck empire. As I said he just paints the grid. You’re moving chess pieces.

Some of us don’t pay attention to the walls we build around our media algorithms as we build them brick by brick. We get caught up in the ongoings of our handhelds and our perceptions begin to reflect that. Then they absorb it completely unless you pull out in time. Most of us aren’t paying attention enough to see it. It’s our own little social media reality we’ve created.

The more that I study and absorb the theory that we create our own realities the more I compare my existence to that of a Sim or a outside spectator of our culture and environment. The more I go down that rabbit hole the more I analyze myself as a computer host rather than a bundle of nerves, muscle, bone and organs.

If you pick up a new hobby or skill your brain is essentially downloading new information into you. Just like a new app. If you’re learning a new skill your brain begins to slowly download your new app to absorb all the rules, instructions of how to play the game (level of skill). How you retain it would depend on how much effort it takes to download (remember) or how much (muscle) memory it requires before you are comfortable using it without outside assistance.

Sometimes we get overwhelmed, memory gets janky and we need a reset. Whether that means a day of “self care” or a vacation to unplug.

*hits reset button

We have built in calculators. Some of us better than others. We have Google too when we have to remember something to recite or recall. Navigation built in although most of us can’t find our asses without a digital map nowadays. Myself included.

We of course all have our own volume levels, caps lock when we yell and space bars when we hesitate..

It’s easy to make these comparisons. Our brains are computers. You get the point I’m trying to make. You’re using your built in cameras right now 👀

They’re taking millions of pictures in your mind as we speak. Your brain is filtering out most of it, adding pics to your memory storage and pushing it into your iCloud.

I’ve hit some major highs and lows in my 53 years. I seem to recall the lows more than highs I suppose because happy things don’t leave scars. The past few months when I noticed my mental health revolving around the negative energy and thoughts surrounding me I decided to shake up my own mental and physical algorithms.

I made a list of things I like and things I don’t. I made another list of habits that are essential to me and ones that keep me orbiting around being an asshat.

And I merged them together.

I started creating a healthier algorithm for myself.

Real life is full of algorithms some obvious some not so much because they may be more mental than physical.

Here’s an easy example: my wife and I are looking for a future vehicle for our daughter. We are both fond enough of Subaru Outbacks and Crosstreks. When we started shopping on marketplace, I say shopping but it’s browsing we are in no hurry, I’d have a few in my marketplace feed for about two days before my entire feed became Subarus. Outbacks, Crosstreks for the most part and then following not far behind Forresters and Ascents. Algorithms are like Velcro y’all they aren’t one sided and they’ll pick up some similar things of interest along the way. Since I was looking at wagon style and all small SUVs I started seeing Rav 4s, Ford Escapes and some old Honda pilots. It opened my horizons to a few more options. Good job Al! We’ve been looking for about two months. For the past two months I’ve seen many, many Subarus on the road, parked in lots, sitting in driveways and of course ads out the wazoo on fb and IG. I doubt there was a huge fire sale on Subarus this year or that they became extremely popular recently they’ve been around for quite some time. My mental algorithms have kicked in. Your brain engages with what’s on your mind so now when a Subaru passes me or vice versa my brain clicks and points – “There’s one!”

Mine also does this with Tacomas as I drive one. It does it with roof top tents, campers and Tundras because I’ve always wanted one but $65k sticker prices can kiss my ass. If I pass ten I’ll see at least 9. I’ll acknowledge it without acknowledging it. It’s a part of my current algorithm. If you add a camper top to a jacked up tundra that’s gonna be a real life pop up ad for me.

Restaurants are too. I’m a “foodie” and my career revolved around food and consumerism so I’ll stare at new concepts being constructed and I’ll judge their themes and food. I drive by a hundred different buildings on Lauren’s daily and I will not be able to recall quite a few of them if they aren’t a part of my algorithms.

Vaccuum repairs?

Insurance companies Jesus they’re everywhere but I don’t even give them a second look. Nail salons? There are about 30 within walking distance from my work. I couldn’t tell you the name of a single one. Hair dressers? Have you seen my hairstyle? I drive by these daily without notice. They don’t pertain to me so my mind filters them out of my daily algorithm. Barbers I notice. I have a beard.

Speaking of, bald men with beards are a part of my algorithm. Can’t help but notice when a slight doppelgänger is in your viewing area.

I’m hyper aware of crowded places and shitty parking. Those are algorithms I avoid.

Music is a simple algorithm. You scroll through your musical feed until you find a (page) station you enjoy.

Think about the times you had a significant other break up with you. The whole “everything reminds me of them!” is relevant because your life mostly revolved around them and your shared algorithms with each other. Experiences, places you visited, friends and new hobbies you absorbed. You separate and now you drive around and hear a song that triggers their memory so you immediately change the station, you change your commute to work if it happens to pass by the coffee shop where you had your first date or you stop going places because they still hang out there. You are purposely changing your algorithms to remove them from your life and memory.

Been there done that.

We get your point so far Chad.

Our own Algorithms are perceptions and how we engage with them.

My morning algorithm for the last 7 months or so were filled with doom scrolling, reading reviews online, consumer opinions and studying competition. After breakfast it became idiot drivers, long loading traffic lights, broken turn signals and my dashboard clock that seemed to push me to hurry everywhere I went. My daily algorithms I found myself disliking the general public. It’s nothing personal it’s just no one has a sense of awareness anymore because life starts and ends with cell phones these days. I’m no different than anyone else for this although when I’m out and about I’m a survival enthusiast so I’m sizing everyone up as mall shooters or fbi agents following me around because of my Google searches.

Now I play a game called NPCs (non player characters) where anyone that’s doing the 100 meter mosey in front of I observe them as a player inserted to either slow me down or they’re just a construct of my imagination. I’ve discussed my newfound affinity for how we are apart of multiple realities and our brains create our surroundings like a very advanced Sims game. I can’t say that’s 💯 where I am at the moment but it’s very interesting the things you begin to notice should you do. There’s too many blips, flips, fluffs, puffs and whats going on around us right now to ignore it. I’m fascinated by it. I’ve told my wife for years I live in a Truman show because whenever I need to get somewhere in a hurry every single obstacle that’s possible obstructs my journey from point A to point B. The mountains feel like Fiji to me for the last 6 months between the hurricanes and now fires add road collapses and weather. If you get bored look at the weather on Sunday and Mondays the last 3 months I bet you’ll see around 4 sunny days combined.

Where was I? NPCs. I’m not saying that I’m surrounded by a bunch of souless characters or robots everyone has their own realities but sometimes I do feel like I’ve created a few with my mind. We all have stereotypes around us I often times think I’ve constructed them in my mind. You expect people that look a certain way to act a certain way. You’ve never seen a blue haired great grandmother pulling into a parking spot in a Dodge Ram 2500 or Jeep Rubicon have you? And then get out and walk 4 mph to the grocery store. She’s going to pop out of Buick Encore, walker in hand and proceed to spend 18 minutes walking to the entrance. Good chance my truck is right behind her as she walks in the middle of the parking lot. On Wednesdays there will be 49 of her. Gotta save that 5% at Publix. I never took this NPC thing seriously until about 2 months ago when I went to Target. While I was shopping for patio goodies for my shop I went to two different Targets three times in one week. I recalled seeing an older lady that resembled an old friend’s mother. She was shopping in the little area where for some reason the home goods are pricier. Maybe it’s a designer collection Im not sure. I always walk through it because I enjoy the energy of that little area (yeah I do this a lot) I wasn’t sure it was her and she wouldn’t know me had I introduced myself so I acknowledged the moment and went about my business. When I went to the Target in Greer I saw what looked to be the same exact person. I laughed at myself thinking that this was just a stereotype of what I would expect to see in this section. Not any different than seeing a young mother with two kids piled into a cart in the baby clothes section right by the cheap jewelry. Which I’m willing to bet you’ll see every time you go. It was when I went back the next week and saw what I would swear was the same woman. Same area. Pushing her cart the EXACT SAME DIRECTION AND AISLE that I decided to leave. This was about the time my brain screamed “Houston we have NPCs”

I’m lightly joking about this declaration in fact I was smiling when I left Target but I’m still looking for the game boy cartridge shoved up my rear. There are no such thing as coincidences.

Also speaking of stereotypes you’ll never see a bunch of bumper stickers on a the back of a $75k plus car. Ever see a “coexist” sticker on a BMW X5? Or a Ford F-150 for that matter. But that’s another stereotype.

My stress level went down and my coping level leveled a bit when I treated the general public as NPCs. I’m not treating them like they don’t exist. I can feel them coughing on me and sometimes I accidentally run into their shopping carts but it put me in the mindset that their actions shouldn’t absorb my actions. Their energy shouldn’t affect mine. Once I plugged that into my mind my algorithms changed.

Morning commute

I changed my focus from traffic and stoplights to engaging with my daughter more. I rarely have the stereo on and my phone is face down. My eyes are on the road and also on the homes I drive past on the way. Greenville for all of its faults is aesthetic and surrounded by flora especially now spring has sprung. I keep my speed level and easy. If someone tries to kill me with their driving prowess I don’t engage. I don’t even acknowledge their existence once I pass them. If I’m at a long traffic stop I get more time with my daughter after a decade of being an absent parent from working all the time.

I still get to work in one piece. My deli opens on time and my blood pressure thanks me for the new new algorithm/ perception I’ve created. Worse case scenario my potato salad gets served an hour later. Certainly not bad enough to keep my middle finger exposed to the elements. You could process this algorithm pattern as a perception also. It’s all relative.

I’ve changed my patterns of how I shop for my deli. I’ve always been a set up your station and run to the store before the rush. I would hit restaurant depot at 9 and swing by Costco right at 10am along with every elderly person in the upstate. Depot was always packed and understaffed when I went in I suppose most service industry people’s schedule aligns with mine it would make sense. It’s always an adventure when I go. In my head as soon as I leave for the store, I would begin a mental countdown. Deli opens at 10, it’s 9:45 I’m 7 carts deep in line and my cashier looks like a WWI war widow. I’m not moving anytime soon and I still have Costco to contend with. I can feel the negativity and stress rise in my blood. I’ve put myself in hurry mode. Something I’m very prone to. I’m angry with the establishment for putting me behind in a situation that I not only created for myself but I’ve put it on repeat for the last year.

It got too much for me and one day I got caught up in a few early boxes and had to put my shopping on hold. I was fortunate enough to not have a rigid inventory that morning so I put off my shopping until after lunch. I left for the store at 2:45 and breezed through depot and Costco in less than an hour. I repeated this for a couple of weeks and changed my routine. My daily algorithms responded in kind. Traffic got lighter, people were less peopling, less chaos and more smiles. Usually when I returned to work I’d have a story to tell about someone pissing me off. Now I go about my business. Another part of my algorithms seemed to be to look for things like that so I could aggressively engage.

The things that piss me off.

That chip I’ve always carried needed to go.

Algorithms are a step by step process or instruction of how you do things. Whether you’re making a vinaigrette or tying your shoes. Often times it’s routine.

I was doing things that piss me off on a daily basis. Routinely

And then getting mad at it.

I changed my algorithms. I changed my routines. All the while creating a new perception of how I see things. Things work well in 3s.

I implemented this as I do the same with my online algorithms. I don’t engage with politics, I don’t argue online anymore. I unfollowed and deleted quite a few triggers online. I quieted a few “friends”. I don’t read online news or watch their videos.

They sell fear and chaos. You don’t have to be a conspiracy theorist to see that.

I ran into a fb friend that works at Costco who remarked about my late afternoon new schedule. I told her I was finding new peace with myself. I had changed my algorithms.

We repeat the same things everyday it’s a part of our algorithms. Even when they don’t align with us because they’ve been in our algorithms for so long we don’t recognize it as something that we should reckon with. I personally no longer want to deal with things that upset me on a daily basis.

It’s my day and no one else’s.

It’s my life and no one else’s.

I’ve changed my morning routine around so I can jump start new algorithms. Once again -Routines are algorithms. If you feel like you’re in a rut, change something you do first thing in the morning. Even if it’s “f#% it I’m gonna do 10 jumping jacks” or sit on the other side of the sofa. Changing your patterns will jumpstart a new algorithm if you allow it to. That is if you don’t like the current ones you’ve built. Which I did not.

You’d be surprised at how one small glitch in your morning routine will realign your brain waves. We aren’t meant to be domesticated into certain routines. Or me at least.

Changing your social media algorithms helped me out too. I don’t enjoy reading political rhetoric at 5am. I don’t want to read about a skyscraper collapsing 8000 miles away 45 seconds after I wake up. For some reason there’s a large handful of you on here that really enjoy sharing bad news. I found myself doing the same for the longest time.

What upsets you or triggers you online will be outside waiting on you as soon as you leave your home. You’ve made it a part of your algorithms. Internet is reality for many of us. I guess that’s what I’ve been trying to say from the beginning. Political opinions have become a lifestyle for some of you. Virtue signaling for things you’ve never seen or experienced first hand. These are my triggers which is the only reason why I singled them out.

Morals and scruples are important to the fabric of our society. Just don’t keep tripping over your toes while you’re trying to show everybody how good you are at showcasing it. I’ve been there folks. I’m no better. I’m just trying to figure it all out for myself. When I write these I’m sharing what works for me. I know yall hate/love this word but we are all snowflakes. What works for me may not work for you.

I’m not selling courses.

I’m just trying to find my peace of mind.

Cheers